Thursday, September 29, 2016
You know what Ohio has that Minnesota does not? Stink bugs. A lot of stink bugs. There was one that had been hanging out on my ceiling for like a week and I thought, gee, I should get rid of that thing. I'd left it there not wanting to agitate it, but I figured by this point it wasn't going to fly at me or anything. Turns out it was still alive, despite not moving for a week, and even though I grabbed it in a tissue, I got stink on me. Let me tell you something. I've gotten ladybug stink on me. I've gotten boxelder stink on me. They do not compare to a stink bug. This motherfucker smells like bad cilantro, and I hate cilantro. And the stink does not come off. I've washed my hands like five times with five different things, exfoliated, used two different lotions...and it's only just finally starting to wear off. I hate stink bugs. They are loud and they swoop at you and then they make you smell bad. Almost makes me miss mosquitoes!