May 2nd - Shit Happens

[This will also be a guest post on Jon's blog later this month, so look for that!]


Shit happens.

Sometimes it's your fault, and sometimes the world's just hating on you. Either way, it can be rough when you don't know what to do after aforementioned shit occurs.



I'm no more qualified to tell you about the shit going on in your life than the next guy, and really, the shit in my life is only rabbit turds compared to a lot of other people's shit. Regardless, I still have an opinion on life's shit and I'd like to tell you how I deal with it.

Here's a nifty plan for you.


Grieve. Don't feel like you need to suck it up, or like it's not a big deal. Even if it's not earth-shattering, it feels that way to you. So let it out - cry, scream, stay in your room and sulk, do whatever it is you need to do to get those emotions out.

Distract Yourself. When you have finished your initial grieving, distract yourself. There's nothing worse than having nothing to do when you're sad, because all you think about it how sad you are, and how things could be better, and all the "what if" questions. This tends to make things worse, so get your mind off your problems for a while. Read a book, spend time with friends, or watch a movie. Anything that helps you think about something else.

Realize. One of the hardest things to face is that sometimes you can't change a situation. When shit like losing your job or your girlfriend happens, a lot of the time you have to realize that it's going to stay like that. You can spend all your time daydreaming about what life might be like if you still had a job or a girlfriend, but at the end of the day, there's nothing you can do. (However, in the event that it is plausible - and don't try and fool yourself about what's plausible - to fix your problems, by all means, fix them!)

Wait. Don't expect to "get over" something awful right away. It takes time. It's an old cliché, but time really does help to heal wounds. In time, you'll notice that things are all right again, and you're becoming happy. This is when the biggest step comes.

Move On. Moving on does not mean forgetting what happened didn't happen, or belittling its importance. It means that you are now free to live without it as a constant weight on your shoulders. It might take a couple tries, but one day you'll wake up and realize that you are a person who is doing just fine despite the shit that happened. Hell, maybe you're even doing better than before.


I hope that this has helped you to deal with your shit, whether it is a mere rabbit turd or a massive elephant poop.
Remember this quote: "Everything is okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end."